The Hairbag Times was, is, and will always be a parody news outlet. All posts and “articles” are works of fiction, intended for entertainment purposes only and none of our content should be taken as truth or fact.

Any references made to actual names, locations, units, commands, or events is purely coincidental and published without intent to inflict malice or emotional harm of any kind. If you believe anything you find here, you should probably resign, or if you've made it this far, vest out/retire.

All material found on “The Hairbag” is intended to be self-deprecating. In no way does any content published here reflect the views or opinions of any government agency or official.

This is not real news.

The Hairbag Times